Instead of wanking on endlessly about terrible things and mincing around raising other people’s money he could just give 95% of his personal fortune away and not miss it – I mean, if he genuinely feels that fucking strongly and wasn’t just trying to look cool, and wanted some credibility.

The benefit of this would be at least two-fold; not only would people in shitty (shittier?) countries lives be saved and their suffering mitigated, but ours would also be better as we wouldn’t have to listen to him bleating on and being such a self-righteous smug bogtrotting prick.

So, Bono – the choice is yours – if you really want to save the world and those of us who live in it then quite literally put your money where your mouth is, and then shut your mouth – otherwise people might just think that you’re a greedy hotel-owning leather-clad anus with an array of wank hats and shite sunglasses.

Your only redeeming quality is that you’ve not started playing the lute yet like Sting does when he’s not too busy gluing the bark back on trees in some random rainforest, the yoghurt-weaving twat.

Yes, it’s a Good Thing that you want to help and it’s good that you bring worthy causes to our attention, but when you could write a cheque now that would have a massive impact, why are you not doing that and shutting the fuck up?

And your music is, and always has been, bland whining derivative toss. You are ‘Cliff Richard with a stylist’ as far as I’m concerned.

You knob.

L

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